We are told from a young age that “you either win or you lose” and that being a loser is not acceptable. We are taught to fight for what we want and that you won’t be complete until you get to the top, until you are the winner. We are told that “you can’t depend on anyone other than yourself” so you are left alone to fight, the only option is to win. What happens when you get to the top? You become the winner, but now what? Where do you go? And is there anyone up there with you or did you pass them all as you raced by? What did you miss as you raced past? Who did you miss? What roads did you pass up? Yes, you are the winner, you are lonely.
What happens if you fall down? Is there anyone that will stop and help you up? You were told to never stop, that winning was the only thing that mattered, the others passing you by were told the same thing, so you are left to pick yourself up. What happens if you fall down and you just don’t have it in you to stand back up and you tell yourself there are too many ahead of you to get to the top and win? You get stuck, you are defeated, you just stay put. Since you now can’t be the winner, you know exactly what that makes you, society has made it clear from an early age. You are now the loser, you are lonely.
So what is it that is at the top that everyone feels they must get to? Do people even know what they are racing to? I have met many people in my life, some are determined to be a winner, some have given up the race and are losers. Both make sure I know which they are and both are more alike than they are different. Winning is a badge winners wear, but if asked why they wanted to win, they have no other purpose other than being about to wear that badge for all to see. Their focus has been on the race, nothing during or after, only on that winning moment. They get to the top and have nowhere else to go, they are stuck. The losers have their own loser badge and while they say they don’t want others to see it, they keep it visible to all, making sure no one expects much of them, afterall, they are a loser. Once they gave up, they could only see others racing past. They can’t be a winner any longer, they are stuck.
But life is not a race. There are no true winners or losers. Life is not black and white or confined to a little box. All we have to do is turn on the TV to see those that live with the Winner/Loser mentality. They make up most of what we are subjected to. The winners and losers talk only about what they have or don’t have. They live in the “me world”. They pick the path that is the most direct to the top or they pick the hole they can get cozy in a use as an excuse. Those that living authentically talk about others, they see forks in the road and they pick the one that looks challenging. They notice those that have fallen down, they help them up, make sure they are dusted off, offer them nourishment, and will allow them to start back on the path ahead of them just to be there if they fall down again in those first few steps (sadly, these people don’t make good TV so we don’t see them much, we have to rely on those in our personal life).
How do you live your life? What are you teaching your children? Do you ever stop and watch a hawk fly? Look at a field of flowers and want to run through them? Do you look out over the ocean and think about the beauty that is just under the surface? Do you see a homeless person and stop to ask them about their life? Do you hold out your hand to someone who has fallen down?
My badge says, “Cory”. I don’t need labels, just the name I was given, because I live to live! What does your badge say? Do you live to live or live to survive?